a golden oldie

Remember this one?

I don't drink, smoke, or swear--dammit, I left my cigarettes in the bar.

crime drama

     Can you imagine a crime drama with a plot that is more like real life? By a plot more like real life I mean we would watch an ordinary person or family going about a daily and weekly routine. We would get to know them a bit and perhaps find their lives interesting. Then "bang!" one of them is dead. No explanation, no psychological profiles or heartfelt speeches about how the killer never had a chance. Just "bang!" you're dead, and maybe some questions from the police and then a funeral. The end.

foster a cat or dog

     Animal shelters and rescue organizations often need a temporary home for a cat or dog. They call it a foster home, or fostering an animal. You keep the animal until a permanent home is found for it. If it needs a veterinarian, the animal shelter or rescue will take care of it. Fostering keeps animal out of shelters. Animals who have been stray can get used to living in a home. Animals who have been abused can learn to trust people.
     Animal shelters euthanize millions of cats and dogs every year. Fostering solves the problem. It can be a rewarding experience. A new kitten is fond of you almost instantly.  When a foster cat hides for weeks, it's a big moment when it finally approaches you.

best quip

     I have worn out all my acquaintance with my speech about why everyone has to vote. A quip recently overheard on TV was so well-put that it might have made a non-voter out of me--
                                        " I never vote. It only encourages them."

teaching a fish to swim

     There's an old saying about teaching people something they already know--"like teaching a fish to swim".  Teaching people something you already know can something like this--like a fish giving swimming lessons.  A fish would probably claim that swimming is as easy as breathing, an attitude that doesn't usually make a good teacher.  The best teacher of swimming would probably be someone who had to struggle harder than an average student to learn it.

my theater idea

    This could be a new form of interactive drama that would get people away from the computer screen and into the theaters--a play in which the audience votes on the fate of the characters. Does the guy get the girl? Thumbs up or thumbs down. Should we let Little Nell live, and for how long? Thumbs up or thumbs down, as in an ancient Roman amphitheater. Is the hero dead, or only wounded? You decide. Wonderfully sick--I would show up myself.

queen for a day

     I noticed the other day that someone else remembers the old game show "Queen For A Day". I can still remember watching that show with my grandmother in the 1960's. The contestants, all women, told the audience why they need a new refrigerator, a washing machine, or something like that. The competition was decided by awarding the prize to the woman with the sorriest tale of woe. Still one of the sickest things I have ever seen on television.